I walked in nervously, palms sweating wondering what everyone was going to be like. I was in a log cabin in the middle of the new forest. It was a group of people I was to spend the next week with. We were a group, who on the surface had little in common; a mix of senior executives, therapists trainers, engineers, designers and even a priest. But a little below the surface the group had one commonality the desire to improve themselves. They were there to learn NLP (Neuro linguistic programming).

It was an extraordinary week not so much because of the NLP techniques I learnt but because of the conversations we had in our log cabin in the middle of the forests. We discussed everything from religion to the Iraq war, the meaning of life to how to deal with difficult teenagers. But what was fascinating was that each and everyone

Respected each other opinions

They Recognised each other by really  listened. Not the Karaoke version of listening but the type of listening which makes you feel that for that moment this conversation is the most important thing in the world

Reassured each other by smiles, open questions, and a moody of learning and calm that it was safe to air your views

And were Responsible and considered for what they said taking responsibility for the impact this had on others and how they responded to others in comment and body language to what other said.

Interestingly it wasn't till I wrote this piece I realised that what had happened was that everyone had modelled the first fundamental of NLP, the 4R's. Not by going "now I'm going to do NLP", but we had done it instinctively, and I realise how lucky I was to actually experience in practice the result of everyone following this principle in action.

So, respect, recognise, reassure yourself and others, and take responsibility for what you say and how you act, and perhaps you'll find the world as amazing as I did on that week in the forests

So till next week I'm going to finish with some words from one of my new friends, Caroline

Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny

David Gardner